Friday, 11 January 2013


What inspired me to write a post about attachments? Well, I simply think this is one topic area that every single human can relate to, including me.

I’m sure the person reading this has had an attachment during their lifetime and some deal with these attachments in different ways. It is the human nature to become attached to a single person, maybe an emotion, memory, physical objects. Have you ever thought what the sole reason behind this is?

Before I begin, I’d like to just state that yes, this blog post will be spiritually and religiously influenced and If you have an issue with that you are not obliged to continue reading. What I will say is that if you somehow feel you have a right to judge someone based on their faith, you need to re-evaluate yourself - or even for the people of the same faith who sadly feel they have a right to judge someone on the level of their faith – even God doesn't judge man until the end of time, so why should you and I?

Let’s begin.

It came to my attention a few years ago that almost everything you feel attachment towards will somehow, during your life time, let you down. It would be logical to conclude, once you have had a good think about this, that the difference between our expectations and the reality of the situation is large. You need to make this clear to yourselves that this world is not perfect, but us humans, we are naturally inclined to seek perfection. You know why? It’s because our original home is the essence of perfection.

You might be staring blankly at the screen thinking ‘I’d rather have Simon Cowell's mansion over my three bedroom house’ but when I refer to ‘home’ I’m actually referring to our original home. Jannah; heaven. It was made for humans and humans were made for it, therefore, throughout your whole life time, when you seek perfection, you are indirectly seeking Jannah, and that is impossible to find in this dunya. You see, once you get your head past it, you’ll start to narrow that gap between your expectations and the realities, then you’ll understand that a disappointment is not yet a disappointment until you make it a disappointment simply because of the way you view it.

If this world was perfect, it wouldn’t be called the dunya. In Arabic, the word dunya has two root meanings, one is ‘close’ and the other, ‘low’. This symbolises that this world is the closest we know to any life and in comparison it is superficial and low to the next life.

No one in this world can say they have no attachments but there are people throughout history who have shown great progression in the process of detaching themselves from ‘the life of this world.' The only way you can achieve such a thing is if by letting go of this world, you are embracing another world; a spiritual world. You see, people who want to make it ‘big’ in this world without correct intentions are usually people who haven’t yet grasped the reality of the next world and only know the reality, or rather, the potential reality of this world, and of course without knowing the difference between the two worlds, this life becomes more attractive. 

Of course, I do not mean to completely seclude yourself from this world or to stop loving the important people or to throw away any prized possessions or memories; but rather to keep that central and most important position for God alone and to detach every part of this world from that spot that is only meant for Him alone.

When we are attached to something - I mean really attached to something, it usually holds a high position in our lives making it to the top of our priority list, usually knocking a few things down in the process. The only thing that should take that central position or rather, the highest position, is God. It reminds me of a situation where I encouraged someone who didn't have the will power to perform a particular act by telling them ‘every good act is regarded as a charity’ –the hadith is in Tirmidhi. A third person listening in replied to me ‘not everything revolves around that.' By ‘that’ she was referring to religion and what does religion stem to originally? God.

Little does the one know who holds a similar view point because without knowing God, the Creator and sustainer of life, how could you possibly know life itself?

My personal issue with attachment is people and there have been many times where the people I rely on to always be there haven’t fulfilled that. And as time went on I realised that this is something we can’t stop, it’s almost natural. It is created as an attribute of this world - you just can’t dodge disappointment, but you can view it a whole new way. As my distorted vision of reality cleared, I realised that before relying on anyone, we should ultimately put our trust and reliance in the hands of God – where our trust originally lies and should always lie because whilst the words ‘people’ and ‘change’ are in my opinion synonyms, God has been the same since the beginning of time and will continue to be. Isn't that brilliant? 

One of the ways we can detach ourselves from people is by pledging to love everyone equally instead of loving one more than the other. Of course, there are exceptions with maybe family members or spouses but that does not mean you put them before God. To your own soul, this is not natural. It’s like trying to fit two puzzle pieces together desperately when they just simply do not fit. Think about it, the source of love, perfection, contentment, happiness, protection, company, all comes from God alone; seeking these attributes from anyone else or even anything else would be absurd and will without fail result in disappointment. This world will always disappoint us in one way or another, therefore it is logical to place your hope and heart in the correct place and the correct place is not this world. The disappointments you've experienced only prove that, don’t they?  

You may be thinking to yourselves whilst reading this, ‘how does one keep God at that central position at all times?’ and the answer to that is simply ‘get to know Him.’ God calls himself by 99 names - they were not revealed without purpose. The process of knowing someone includes knowing them through their attributes and there are more than plenty of attributes to know God by. You just simply can’t attribute 99 characteristics to any one human being – this is God. This is our Creator. When you get to know Him, you’ll know perfection, you’ll know love and you’ll know the difference between this life and what awaits us.

How then does God, the Creator of this world, describe it? A verse of the Qur’an comes to mind when this question is posed: 
“Every soul shall taste death [..] and the life of this world is only a deceiving enjoyment.” (Qur’an 3:185) 
This puts things into perspective for us, it reminds us of what’s to come - death, and it reminds us of the true reality of this world, correcting our distorted vision.

To finish, I want to share with you another verse that is the answer to disappointment or detachment and It is not a promise from me, it is a promise from the creator Himself. How could you possibly brush past or forget His promise? With out doubt, the promise of Allah is true:

“Surely, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (Qur’an 13:28)


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